Jack of all trades, master of none

When I was younger, my mother forced me to attend different summer classes. She had an explanation that she does it for my own good. So every summer, it was not a vacation or anything for me because every summer I have to learn something new and back then I equated learning to NO FUN. Every summer I would have piano lessons, ballet classes, voice lessons, jazz lessons, painting lessons, leadership workshops, driving classes and swimming lessons. All I wanted then was to learn how to bike. I did learn how to bike after I skipped the painting lessons. Now that I am older, I thanked my mom for forcing me to attend all those classes. Sure they were not cheap but back then I did not appreciate what my mom did for me. Imagine if she has not enrolled me to any of it, I would not get the chance to learn new things and discover that I can be good at some things. I can always work for things.

In all those classes, I strived to be the best. I am competitive and I always wanted to win and be the best. I like being recognized for my efforts but in a subtle way. For example, in school, I study because 1.) I wanted to learn but more of 2.) wanting to be part of the top ten in our class so 3.) I get to attend awards night. I know it is a very conceited reason but hey I make my parents proud. I am proud of what I am doing. But you know there is truth in what they say: "jack of all trades, master of none"

I feel like I am competent enough in many things. I am pretty smart. I can sing. I can dance. I don't see anything that I can't be competent at. I can work for it. But there is nothing which I am the best at. Sure I can sing but I am not the diva. I can dance but I am no dancer. I have so many options that I can actually pursue but I ended up having pursued none. I envy some people who are only be good at one thing because at least they are able to focus on that alone and be the best in it. But when you can be good in many things, how do you choose which path to pursue. I want to be recognized for one thing and I want to pursue that and be the best in that. But up to know, I am always the jack but never the master.

E